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If you go to a bar and it’s seven bucks for a beer and twelve bucks for a cocktail, you…
- Order a drink! This place is cheap!
- Are you kidding? I get the hell out
- I find the owner… and punch him square in the face
And where do you wanna get your fruits and veggies from?
- The supermarket
- My neighbor
- I'll just grow my own!
When you’re driving around you’ll probably see a tractor OR a trailer, but what are the odds that you’ll see a tractor AND a trailer on the same trip?
How do you get around town?
- I drive
- Public transit
- I walk a lot
You’re invited to a potluck at a friend’s house, what’re you bringing?
- A homemade casserole
- Something exotic
- A veggie tray I picked up at the supermarket
- Dessert… always dessert
Time to eat! Who do you want preparing your next meal?
- Professionally trained chefs
- Food truck folk
- Fast-Food Employees
- Someone's Grandma
Which view would you prefer waking up to each morning?
- Ah... the city!
- Gorgeous mountains
- Fertile farmland
- A vibrant ethnic neighborhood
What kind of animals do you own?
What are you most likely to see in your nearest “downtown” area?
- Empty storefronts
- Crazy traffic
- A murder
How often does the pastor see you in church?
- Almost never
- Every Sunday
- A few times a week
What's your idea of a traffic jam?
- Too many cars
- Too many cows
Ever been mugged?
- Yep. I don’t recommend it!
Where are you guaranteed to see your neighbors?
- At the grocery store
- On my porch… if I’m barbecuing
- At church
- At Friday’s football game
Which interior home decor do you prefer?
- Modern, but a little homey
- Ultra-modern and sleek
- Country style, nice and homey
- Your grandma's living room
- None of these... yuck...
When was the last time you mowed your own lawn?
- What’s a lawn?
- I have people for that
- Yesterday… and I mowed my neighbor’s lawn, too!
And what's your idea of a fun Saturday night?
- Getting drunk with the locals
- Just you, your truck, and the open country
- Falling asleep on the couch
What thought makes you feel more lonely?
- Too many people I don't know, all in the same place!
- Empty road that stretches for miles and miles with no people in sight!
- I don't want either!
What is the FFA?
- The Future Farmers of America
- The folks who regulate airlines
- The folks who regulate TV and radio
- Who cares?
How much time do you spend in the great outdoors?
- Most of the time
- Not as much as I’d like
- What’s the outdoors and why is it so “great?”
And if you do happen to get back to nature, what do you do?
- Go to the beach
- Camp, hunt, fish… the usual stuff
Which sort of architecture do you find most pleasing to the eye?
- Country estates
- Modern skyscrapers
- Old urban neighborhoods
- Old shacks in the middle of nowhere
- Shopping malls with big sales
Where do you do most of your clothes shopping?
- Places like Nordstrom or Macys
- Tractor Supply
- Wherever there’s a sale!
City dwellers and country folk alike enjoy some... "unique" dishes. Which of the following exotic foods would you most like to dig into?
- Pickled pig's feet
- Roadkill sandwich
- I wouldn't try any of this crap!
What’s the “other white meat?”
When someone says, “Let’s go swimming” what do you picture?
- A shimmering pool and a mojito
- A shimmering ocean and a boogie board
- A shimmering river and a beer
- A shimmering lake and a rope swing
How many guns do you own?
- None of yer damn business, Fed!
How often do you see your extended family (aunts, cousins, etc.)?
- Almost never
- Occasionally… like holidays
- Pretty often
- Damn near every day
You’re out at a restaurant, what non-alcoholic drink do you order?
- Sweet tea
- Soda pop
- A glass of water is fine
- Bottled water is better
- A kale and beet smoothie with a shot of acai juice
What's your idea of expanding your cultural horizons?
- Visiting a museum or gallery
- Attending a play or other performance
- Eating out at the local Chinese buffet
Which of these do you love most about where you live?
- The people
- The slow pace
- The fast pace
- I just love the vibe