You run into an old friend and she's got a big tummy; what do you say to her?
- "I didn't know you are pregnant"
- "You look awesome"
- "You haven't changed a bit"
- "You used to be skinny"
You get carded at a restaurant even though you're of age; what's your reaction?
- "Aww, nice, you shouldn't have"
- "I bet you get carded every time too"
- "Really? Is this necessary?"
- "Can we do a selfie of you carding me?"
The nerdiest person at work has a crush on you and asks you out...
- I go... what's not to like?
- I quit my job unexpectedly
- I talk about the (phony) relationship I just go in to
- I let them down gently
You're invited to go to a clothing optional hot springs with a bunch of friends...
- What's 'optional' mean exactly?
- I'll just watch, thanks
- I'm in!
- I'll wear clothes
You go to shake someone's hand and they do the "ick-germs" pull-back; you think...?
- "OMG, I so get that!"
- "Okay, then can I hug you?"
- "How rude"
- "Oh, get over it!"
Time to meet the potential in-laws, what's your pre-meet-and-greet routine?
- I visit my parents for coaching and style tips
- It's not a big deal to me
- I buy a new super-conservative outfit
- Not sayin', but it involves vodka
You can admit to having worn high-water pants recently:
- It's the new trend
- With pride!
- A long time ago...
- What are high-water pants?
Your bride-and-groom speech totally bombs and the guests are waiting:
- I thank them with a smile and leave the podium calmly
- I start over with all-new material
- I add on a bit about how I'm not funny but full of love
- I give the MC the secret 'rescue-me' sign, and he does
The public bathroom stall you barge into is occupied; reaction?
- I slam the door and run to the next one
- I apologize with an embarrassment-shared giggle
- I want to die
- I don't barge...