How Catty Are You?
Do you enjoy a good break-up? Do you delight in the misfortune of others? Do you find yourself sneering at happiness? Is schadenfreude a way of life rather than an unpronounceable German word? Then you might just be catty! How catty? Retract your claws, take our quiz, and find out!
“Does this make my butt look big?” You say:
- “Relative to what?”
- “No, you look great!”
- “Not like… rhino big”
- “Believe me, the world never has a problem seeing your butt”
The arch-villain in your life (don’t lie, you have one) just broke-up with their significantly hot significant other. You say:
- “Oh my god! Are you OK?”
- “Hmm. That lasted a lot longer than I thought it would!”
- “How did this happen? Oh wait. It’s you. That explains a lot.”
- “So, you won’t get mad if I ask them out, right?”
Your friend is showing off her engagement ring. You say:
- “Congratulations! It’s beautiful!”
- “Oh… how adorable! It’s so tiny!”
- “Could you stop waving it around? It’s not a flag.”
- “Where's the ring?”
You’re watching the Academy Awards and Johnny Depp is dressed like… well… Johnny Depp. You say:
- “Who cares? He’s hot!”
- “He looks better than last year. It’s a start.”
- “Why, Johnny? Why?”
- “Are you seeing this? It’s like a cat pirate puked up a hairball of laundry!”
Your best friend introduces you to their new piece of arm candy. You say:
- “Is it true you guys met on match.com?”
- “Mmmm. You smell like breakfast.”
- “Pleased to meet you”
You meet someone who is waaaay too nice. Like cloyingly sweet. You say:
- “Seriously, Dorothy, Kansas is that way. And don’t forget your dog.”
- “You are sooo nice! We are totally going to get along!”
- “You are sooo nice! I just want to smother you with a Hello Kitty pillow!”
- “Gotta go! I feel a diabetic coma coming on.”
You get a promotion at work and your coworker doesn’t. You say:
- “I can’t believe they didn’t promote you, too”
- “Don’t be sad. I hear they’re firing you anyway!”
- “Stop pouting! Why does this have to be about you?”
- Nothing. I just point and laugh.
The alarm clock just went off and your SO is sleeping next to you. You say:
- "You're a hot mess, go take a shower."
- "Time to get up!"
- "Do I look like you in the morning?"
- They look so peaceful, I can't wake them
An acquaintance just lost a lot of weight. You say:
- "About time."
- "I bet they will just put it back on"
- "I wonder how they did it so quickly?"
- "Good for them!"
You see a picture of an amazingly ugly baby on Facebook. You comment:
- “Such beautiful....skin..."
- “Wow. Just… wow.”
- “Jeeze, call an exorcist.”