Which Seinfeld Character Are You?

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Question 1/12

A woman's purse has opened in the middle of the street, and she is busy trying to gather everything together. As you pull up in your car after a long day at work, you decide to...

  • Jump out eagerly and help her.
  • Wait in your car with the motor running until she has cleared out.
  • Drive around the block a few times so she doesn't judge you for not helping.
  • Drive on carefully around her, and maybe crush a lipstick or two.
  • Honk continuously.
Question 2/12

You see a guy in the produce aisle that you think you know. Suddenly it hits you--he used to beat you up every day in fourth grade! You...

  • Ask him why he beat you up and try to get an apology out of him.
  • Take a photo of him to show old friends how ugly he's become.
  • Freak out and run away from him.
  • Punch his lights out!
  • Go introduce yourself so he can see how cool you turned out.
Question 3/12

What's running through your head the morning of a big exam?

  • Nothing; you like to keep your head clear.
  • Some easy-listening music to get you in a good mood.
  • Something with a heavy beat to get you pumped.
  • A confused wash of equations and phrases from lecture.
  • A silly mnemonic device or rhyme you invented.
Question 4/12

From which of these reality shows would you be eliminated first?

  • Big Brother
  • American Idol
  • The Apprentice
  • Last Comic Standing
  • Fear Factor
Question 5/12

Your dream roommate is...

  • Someone who hangs out and parties with you.
  • No one--you prefer a single.
  • Someone who leaves you alone.
  • Someone who puts up with you.
  • Someone who you can confide in.
Question 6/12

How do you usually deal with solicitors who call your phone?

  • Listen to their pitch--it could be interesting!
  • Tell them sweetly to never call again.
  • Tell them to get a real job.
  • Hang up on them.
  • Tell them to call back at a better time.
Question 7/12

You walk into the shower room at the pool to discover that everyone is changing or walking around in the nude...and it's a coed pool! You...

  • Tell everybody of the opposite sex to turn around.
  • Stay in your swimsuit.
  • Walk past and change in the bathroom stall.
  • Hit on the cutest nudist.
  • Chat it up with your naked neighbor while you undress.
Question 8/12

Your car stalls on the freeway and everyone you know is asleep. You...

  • Hitchhike.
  • Walk all the way home.
  • Call everyone you know and hope someone wakes up.
  • Call a cab.
  • Sleep in your car until AAA arrives.
Question 9/12

You have a huge test in the morning, but just as you close your eyes for bed, a big, loud party starts up right outside your window! You...

  • Roll over and pull your covers over your head.
  • Get up and put on your party clothes!
  • Politely lean out your window and explain your problem to them. They'll understand.
  • Throw something out your window at them and shout.
  • Get up, go outside, and turn off their boombox. With your baseball bat.
Question 10/12

When you see someone you're attracted to in a cafe, you...

  • Keep on walking. Love is hopeless.
  • Pretend to drop your fork or trip next to them to catch their attention.
  • Tell them you are attracted to them. Hey, it's true.
  • Is this seat taken?
  • Get a table riiiiiiiight behind theirs. Maybe they can feel your breath when you exhale.
Question 11/12

Your waiter gets you a Coke instead of the Diet Coke you ordered. To excuse himself, he gives you a free appetizer. You...

  • Tip flat rate no matter what. Double the tax it is!
  • Tip more than normal. A free appetizer definitely makes up for a little mishap.
  • Tip less than normal. A mistake is a mistake.
  • Negative cancels a positive. You tip what you would normally tip.
  • None of the above.
Question 12/12

You're in your room and you hear someone yell "Fire!" You also know that your neighbor is notorious for playing pranks. You...

  • Knock on your neighbor's door and ask if it's for real.
  • If there really is a fire you'll find out soon enough. Take no action and risk finding out the hard way.
  • Call the cops directly. If there is no fire, your neighbor gets humiliated.
  • Turn off your TV and listen for another cry for help.
  • Turn up your TV. It's sure to be a false alarm.
Calculating Result...

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