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      Which Van Damme Are You?

      Which Van Damme Are You?
      Movies

      By BrainFall Staff - Updated: October 21, 2015

      You’re so tough you just don’t give a Van Damme. But which version of the Muscles from Brussels do you most resemble? Read on and find out!

      Which Van Damme Are You?

      Ever fantasized about roundhouse kicking your way through the villainous hordes of Hollywood like the Muscles from Brussels himself? You're in luck because the time has come to find out just which version of the legendary martial artist and action star, Jean-Claude Van Damme, you embody. Whether it’s performing epic splits between two moving trucks or taking down an evil syndicate with nothing but your wits and killer spin kicks, Van Damme has been the high-kicking heartthrob of the action world for decades.

      A line-up of five distinct characters, each representing a different persona of Van Damme, with varying expressions and stances

      Your penchant for smooth moves and cooler-than-cool one-liners isn't just a daydream; it's about to get personal. Are you more of the stoic soldier from "Universal Soldier," or do you vibe with the suave double trouble of "Double Impact"? Perhaps you possess the swagger of "Timecop," darting through timelines with martial arts finesse. Let's embark on this cinematic sojourn and uncover which celluloid slice of this Brussels export resonates with your inner action hero spirit.

      Ready to confront the baddies lurking in the corners of your imagination? Buckle up, stretch those limbs, and prepare for some self-discovery that might just make you want to break out into impromptu training montages. Stay sharp, future Van Dammes, and remember – the world always needs more heroes with an accent that's just as strong as their punch.

      The Rise of a Belgian Icon

      A Belgian flag rises against a vibrant sunset sky, with the silhouette of a famous martial artist in the foreground

      You've seen the action-packed splits and whirlwind kicks, but now it's time to dive into what transformed a Belgian martial artist into a global sensation. Our man Jean-Claude Van Damme didn't just do the impossible on screen; he lived a tale of fame, muscles, and pure fight choreography brilliance.

      Kickboxing Karate Champ Turned Movie Star

      Before the spotlight hit, your boy Jean-Claude polished his karate and kickboxing skills, snatching up trophies faster than he could deliver a roundhouse kick. His exploits in the ring even dabbled in Muay Thai, showcasing the kind of versatility only a true-blooded action hero could embody. Van Damme cultivated a presence that couldn't be ignored, one that would soon catapult him into the pulsing neon lights of 80s cinema.

      Splits, Kicks, and Cinematic Hits

      If martial arts had a rockstar poster child, it would be Van Damme doing the splits. This guy didn’t just bring martial arts to the silver screen; he made it impossible to imagine action movies without his signature flexibility. Hollywood got a taste of Van Damme fever with classics like "Bloodsport" and "Kickboxer," where he didn't just act but redefined what action meant.

      Buddies and Rivals: Van Damme's Hollywood Encounters

      In the land of titans like Stallone, Schwarzenegger, and Dolph Lundgren, Van Damme held his own, flexing not just muscles but acting chops as well. He's rubbed shoulders with the likes of Jet Li and Michael Jai White in epics such as "Universal Soldier: Regeneration" and "The Quest". Don’t forget, he even joined the macho ensemble cast of "The Expendables 2," because, what's a party without the Muscles from Brussels's high-kicking charm? And yes, the action hero universe nearly imploded when he finally clashed with Steven Seagal.

      Trials, Tribulations, and Triumphs

      Prepare to roundhouse kick your way through the tempestuous saga that is Jean-Claude Van Damme's life, with muscles from Brussels sprouting everywhere, marriages that might rival your Tinder swipes, and career flips more dramatic than a Van Damme split.

      From Fame to Flame-Out: A Career of Ups and Downs

      Ah, the dazzling heights of Double Impact, where you play your own twin and kick twice as much butt! Those were the days. But even with the flex-worthy success of Timecop and the grit of Sudden Death, Hollywood is fickle. Remember Van Damme in Street Fighter? Imagine explaining that movie to aliens as representative of Earth culture.

      The Muscles from Brussels' Personal Battles

      While you admired JCVD's high kicks in Lionheart, the man behind the splits faced real-life villains like bipolar disorder and cocaine addiction. DUIs and medication might not have the same ring as Nowhere to Run, but they're battles he fought candidly. His training montage for life included rehab stints and the pursuit of equilibrium.

      Legacy: Statues, Spinoffs, and Social Media

      Fast-forward past a smattering of movies with delightfully literal titles like Derailed and In Hell, and JCVD's flexing has gone from purely physical to digital, with a YouTube presence. Like his enduring bronze statue in Belgium, his social media's a monument to his martial arts icon status. His direct-to-DVD kingdom, with titles like The Hard Corps, might not be Oscar-bait, but hey, they can't all be Black Water.

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      Question 1/10

      Your boss is freaking out. How to you play it?

      • I calmly point out what the problem is
      • I get out of their sight
      • I take care of the problem
      • I get all the people who can make the situation better
      Question 2/10

      It’s the second date, and you have to cook! What do you go for?

      • I practice until I have it down
      • I take my date to a great restaurant instead
      • I call a caterer
      • I enlist in my date's help
      Question 3/10

      You need a theme song. What is it?

      • Taylor Swift - Shake It Off
      • Anything from Rage Against the Machine
      • The Braveheart main theme song
      • Anything Jack Johnson or Ben Harper
      Question 4/10

      What is your greatest enemy?

      • Time
      • The military
      • The person who's trying to kill me
      • Evil and injustice
      Question 5/10

      You need to knock someone out. What do you do?

      • A kick to the head
      • Tap a pressure point
      • Whatever hurts them the least
      Question 6/10

      Who would you pick as your mentor?

      • I don’t do well with authority
      • An old monk
      • A mad scientist
      • Colin Powell
      Question 7/10

      How do you feel about killing people?

      • I kill anyone who tries to kill me
      • I kill those people who deserve it
      • I only kill if it serves the greater good
      • I don’t like killing people
      • I kill who I’m told to
      Question 8/10

      Who would be your best friend?

      • A really loyal dog
      • A sibling
      • A person whom I served in the military with
      • The person whom I most respect
      Question 9/10

      A hottie is hitting on you at the bar. What do you do?

      • I'm not interested
      • I flirt back
      Question 10/10

      Your child gets in a fight at school. How do you react?

      • I high-five them
      • I make my kid apologize to the other child
      • I discipline my kid
      • I threaten the other kid’s parents with arrest if their kid steps out of line again
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