Which Chuck Norris Are You?
Your friends have been kidnapped by secret agents. How do you rescue them?
- I sneak in through the ventilation system
- I knock out every bad guy with a single punch or kick
- I blow up their secret base
- I shoot first, then forget to ask questions later
Your favorite food after an exhausting mission is:
- Beef jerky
- A knuckle sandwich
- A prune juice and human growth hormone smoothie
- Justice, medium-rare, with a side of vengeance
You don't have time for vacations. But what is your favorite place in the world to kick butt?
- Asia, so I can perfect my martial arts with my old master
- My jabs and crosses are bigger in Texas
- Eastern Europe, so I can find secret bases
- South Florida, where it's sunny and beachy
You'd most likely name your first son:
- Dallas, Austin, Houston, or Corpus Christi
- Honey Badger, Dragon, Colt 45, or Knuckles
- Eagle Eye, Ace, Irish, or Gunny
- John, Sam, Tyler, or Chuck
The only drink hard enough for you is:
- A pint of cobra venom with a hint of lime
- A canteen full of unfiltered well water
- A gallon of Budweiser
- A tall glass of sake mixed with tears of my enemies
How will you go out?
- I'll be back-to-back with my best friend, surrounded by a platoon of insurgents and no ammunition
- I'll retire somewhere nice and quiet to live out the rest of my days
- I'll keep punching and kicking until my bones can't take it anymore
Your girlfriend asks you to hold her purse while she tries on shoes. What do you do?
- I would drop a smoke bomb and get out of there
- I'd stare at her with my arms crossed until she gets the hint
- I'd call in backup to contain and destroy the purse before it causes any harm to my manliness
- I would do the polite thing and hold it
Besides the bear you keep as a wrestling partner, what is your favorite kind of pet?
- My Tyrannosaurus rex
- A bunch of immature mutant turtles
- My tired old hound dog
- An armadillo or a longhorn bull
Your mother always told you the fastest way to a girl's heart is...
- A cowboy hat and a sense of honor
- Never being late
- Scaring away every other man with my alpha presence
- My grace under pressure
Which of the following would you completely eliminate to make the world a better place?
- Drug dealers
- Liars and cheats