Which Fictional Lawyer Are You?
Lawyering Up Your Personality!
By BrainFall Staff - Updated: April 9, 2024
Which type of lawyer should you be? If you consult a supervillain, the answer will be none. If you seek the wisdom of someone who prefers currency over world domination, they will probably point you in the nearest law school’s direction. That response eliminates where, but the “what” remains.
This quiz narrows down your options for you! Let BrainFall decide if your rising brain should focus its potent power on becoming a personal injury lawyer, real estate lawyer, criminal lawyer, intellectual property lawyer, or tax lawyer. Unlike these types of workers, we won’t charge. The only labor incurred is your time and energy in taking an honest look at your favorite and least favorite aspects of education, law, and your sense of self. All five of these paths lead to endless hours educating yourself on evolving laws and leveraging that knowledge and personality to deliver the best outcomes when you represent clients.
This quiz does not constitute legal advice, although we think it’ll behoove you to carefully consider your result!
There are many different types of lawyers that help individual clients evade scrupulous situations and improve society's overall ability to function in an orderly fashion. The most common types of lawyers include a business lawyer, a criminal lawyer (defense and prosecution for criminal cases), a civil litigation lawyer (a fancy term for civil trial lawyers who help navigate civil lawsuits), an immigration lawyer (specialists in matters like citizenship, visas, refugee status, etc.), and an estate planning lawyer (someone who assists in planning and executing asset allocation). Criminal lawyers enjoy particular fame due to the added human interest element lending to higher media coverage and extensive fictional dramas. In fact, the movie 12 Angry Men introduced many to the criminal jury process and is widely considered one of the greatest movies ever made.
In addition to antics, lawyers are known for affluence. The national average annual wage of a lawyer is over $144,000 dollars, almost three times the amount of the average salary of all occupations in the United States. That wealth comes at a steep cost in law school fees and years of studying, plus the potential struggle of landing a lucrative job as a beginner. Many aspiring lawyers quit or work at a modest law firm for years before advancement.
Deciding on a career path in law can feel like trying to find a needle in a haystack—except the haystack is made entirely of needles because, let’s face it, law has more branches than a government tree. As we tiptoe through this forest of possibilities, the question buzzing louder than a courthouse full of business attire-clad bees is: "What type of lawyer should we be?"
Our personalities, interests, and goals are as varied as the pizza toppings available at a New York pizzeria. Some of us are born to advocate for the underdog, fighting tooth and nail for justice in the criminal courts. Others might find a calling in the serene, book-lined offices where corporate law reigns supreme. And let's not forget those who dream of shouting "objection!" so loudly even the courtroom sketch artists jump. But fear not! We've developed a method that's better than spinning the Wheel of Legal Fortunes.
Have you ever imagined which legal eagle you'd be in another life? Or pondered which arguments you'd passionately present in the courtroom? Well, consider this the closest thing to a legal sorting hat—a quiz designed by the wily wizards at BrainFall to transport you from the corner of Confused and Curious right to the doorstep of Your Lawyerly Self. So, before you don that tailored suit and practice your most authoritative "Your Honor," prepare to meet the attorney within!
Choosing your path in the legal world is akin to picking the most promising path through a thick, twisty forest. We'll take a peek at a few choice clearings where you might set up your legal campsite.
In the thicket of family law, we're talking heart and hearth. Your weekdays are filled with cases brimming with emotion, from the joy of adoptions to the complexities of divorce. Think of yourself as a legal Cupid, sometimes patching relationships with custody agreements or carving out new family units through guardianship. Your briefcase is practically a stork in an Armani suit, delivering bundles of legal documents that define paternity and secure alimony.
Nothing screams 'hero' more than a criminal lawyer with a cape of justice, swooping in to defend someone accused of criminal activity. As a criminal defense lawyer, you're the knight in shining armor for the underdogs, possibly working as a public defender. You'll match wits with prosecutors in high stakes games of legal chess, always geared up to shout "objection!" in the courtroom coliseum. Think of the courtroom as your personal dojo, where you karate chop falsehoods and high-kick for the truth.
Imagine jetting from one glass skyscraper to another, suit sharp, mind sharper. As a corporate lawyer, you'll hobnob with the executives, navigating the stratosphere of corporate law. You're the maestro of mergers, the sultan of stocks, the vizier of venture capital. Whether you're negotiating contracts or drafting them, you're ensuring businesses don’t plummet from their high-flying ventures. The corporate jungle is where you thrive—amid the dense underbrush of legalese, you clear the way for commerce to flourish.
Choosing the right law career is like picking a character in a video game, only this character shapes your real-world future. So, let's meet your legal avatars, shall we?
What do you get when you cross a wit sharper than a tack with the need to protect creativity? That's right, our Intellectual Property Comedian! Imagine guarding the castle of creativity where ideas are the treasure and patents the shields. We're talking standing ovation-worthy performances in technology and entertainment, protecting the punchlines and the programming codes alike.
If you wear green on more than just St. Patrick's Day and thrive on nurturing our big blue marble, you might just be our Environmental Avenger. With the smarts of an environmental lawyer, you're in the business of safeguarding Mother Nature. Feel that cape fluttering as you joust with polluters and high-five beaming trees. Your trusty sidekicks include environmental law tomes and government agencies.
Abracadabra, alakazam! Dive into the world of tax law and emerge a Tax Wizard. Steered by a spellbinding interest in fiscal frameworks, you're the Gandalf of your realm. Whether it's crafting mystical tax shelters or consulting the ancient tomes for the IRS, your knowledge is golden. As a tax lawyer, you conjure up savings and deftly navigate the labyrinth of tax, a true Merlin to the government's hoard.