The Emotional Baggage Check: What Are You Bringing into Love?

By BrainFall Staff - Published: March 10, 2025

We all approach relationships carrying invisible emotional suitcases packed with our past experiences, childhood lessons, and previously formed attachments. These unseen influences shape how we connect, trust, communicate, and love in ways we might not fully recognize. Whether it’s the wounds from past heartbreaks, the subtle messages we internalized growing up, or the protective patterns we’ve developed along the way, this emotional baggage influences our relationship choices and behaviors – sometimes helping us navigate connection wisely, other times creating obstacles to the very closeness we desire. The good news? Recognizing your particular pattern is the first step toward more conscious relationships. By understanding what you’re carrying, you gain the power to choose which items from your emotional suitcase still serve you and which might be weighing you down unnecessarily. This quiz explores the different types of emotional patterns people commonly bring into relationships. By identifying your primary pattern, you’ll gain insight into your unique relationship strengths and challenges – and most importantly, how to navigate them with greater awareness. So, what exactly are you packing in your emotional suitcase? Let’s find out!

Start Quiz!

step
step
step
step
step
step
step
step
step
step
step
step

Question 1/12

You've been dating someone wonderful for a few months when they mention they'll be traveling for work for two weeks. Your first thought is?

"I wonder if they'll still feel the same way about us when they return..."
"I hope they follow through on staying in touch like they promised."
"Great! I could use some alone time to recharge and focus on my projects."
"I should plan something special for their return to show I'm a thoughtful partner."

Question 2/12

Your partner seems quieter than usual today. What's your most likely response?

Repeatedly ask what's wrong, feeling increasingly anxious until they reassure you
Give them space but privately worry they might be hiding something from you
Maintain a positive atmosphere, assuming it will blow over if it's important
Appreciate the quiet time, assuming they'll talk when ready

Question 3/12

During a disagreement with your partner, you're most concerned about:

The conflict damaging your relationship or leading to a breakup
Whether they're being completely honest about their feelings
Keeping the peace and finding a solution that makes everyone happy
Maintaining your independence and not giving in just to please them

Question 4/12

Which relationship scenario makes you most uncomfortable?

Your partner wants more independent time and activities
Your partner doesn't share details about their conversations with their ex
Your partner wants to discuss an ongoing issue you'd rather let go
Your partner expects to be included in all your future plans

Question 5/12

A friend asks what makes relationships difficult for you. Your most honest answer would be:

"I worry about getting too attached because people tend to leave eventually."
"I have a hard time believing what people say, even when I want to."
"I struggle to express my needs or disagreements directly."
"I feel suffocated when relationships become too demanding or close."

Question 6/12

You're going through photos and find one of your partner looking happy with their ex. Your reaction?

Feel a knot in your stomach wondering if they miss their ex
Wonder if there are things your partner isn't telling you about that relationship
Put the photo back and never mention it to avoid any awkwardness
Note it as part of their past but feel it has little relevance to your relationship

Question 7/12

What would you most likely lie awake worrying about in a relationship?

Whether you're doing enough to keep your partner interested and committed
If your partner is being completely honest with you about everything
How to address a sensitive issue without creating conflict
Whether the relationship is becoming too restrictive of your freedom

Question 8/12

Someone gives you unexpected constructive criticism about your role as a partner. You're most likely to:

Worry that these flaws might cause your partner to leave eventually
Wonder about their motives for pointing out these issues
Thank them while feeling inwardly devastated, avoiding further discussion
Consider their points but ultimately trust your own judgment about your relationship

Question 9/12

When starting a new relationship, what thought is most likely to cross your mind?

"How long will this last before they lose interest or leave?"
"I'll take my time revealing too much until I know I can trust them."
"I hope we want the same things so there won't be difficult conversations."
"I need to make sure this doesn't interfere with my independence."

Question 10/12

Which past experience has most influenced how you approach relationships today?

Having someone you deeply cared about suddenly exit your life
Discovering you were deceived by someone you trusted
Growing up in an environment where conflict led to serious consequences
Being in a relationship that required sacrificing important parts of yourself

Question 11/12

Your partner suggests living together. Your immediate internal reaction is:

Excitement but also pressure to make sure the shared home is perfect
Concern about whether they'll stick around once they see your day-to-day habits
Hesitation about losing your personal space and independence
Agreement, even if you have reservations you're not voicing

Question 12/12

Which statement resonates most with your approach to relationship problems?

"I need constant reassurance that the problem won't lead to a breakup."
"I carefully observe actions rather than just believing what I'm told."
"I tend to minimize issues to keep things peaceful."
"I need time alone to process before engaging with relationship issues."

Calculating Result...