So, what’ll it be? A life out in the country with fresh air and home-cooked meals? Or do you prefer big city life, replete with all the modern cultural delights? Take the quiz to see where you belong! If you go to a bar and it’s seven bucks for a beer and twelve bucks for a cocktail, you… Order a drink! This place is cheap!. Are you kidding? I get the hell out. I find the owner… and punch him square in the face. And where do you wanna get your fruits and veggies from? The supermarket. My neighbor. I'll just grow my own!. When you’re driving around you’ll probably see a tractor OR a trailer, but what are the odds that you’ll see a tractor AND a trailer on the same trip? 1:1. 1:5. 1:10. 1:Never. How do you get around town? I drive. Cabs/Uber. Public transit. Bike. I walk a lot. Tractor. You’re invited to a potluck at a friend’s house, what’re you bringing? Alcohol. A homemade casserole. Something exotic. A veggie tray I picked up at the supermarket. Dessert… always dessert. Time to eat! Who do you want preparing your next meal? Professionally trained chefs. Food truck folk. Fast-Food Employees. Someone's Grandma. Which view would you prefer waking up to each morning? Ah... the city!. Gorgeous mountains. Fertile farmland. A vibrant ethnic neighborhood. Suburbia!. What kind of animals do you own? Cats. Dogs. Birds. Reptiles. Varmints. Livestock. What are you most likely to see in your nearest “downtown” area? Empty storefronts. Crazy traffic. People. A murder. How often does the pastor see you in church? Almost never. Sometimes. Every Sunday. A few times a week. What's your idea of a traffic jam? Too many cars. Too many cows. Ever been mugged? Yep. I don’t recommend it!. Nope. Where are you guaranteed to see your neighbors? At the grocery store. On my porch… if I’m barbecuing. At church. At Friday’s football game. Which interior home decor do you prefer? Modern, but a little homey. Ultra-modern and sleek. Country style, nice and homey. Your grandma's living room. None of these... yuck.... When was the last time you mowed your own lawn? What’s a lawn?. I have people for that. Yesterday… and I mowed my neighbor’s lawn, too!. And what's your idea of a fun Saturday night? Clubbing. Rocking. Getting drunk with the locals. Just you, your truck, and the open country. Falling asleep on the couch. What thought makes you feel more lonely? Too many people I don't know, all in the same place!. Empty road that stretches for miles and miles with no people in sight!. I don't want either!. What is the FFA? The Future Farmers of America. The folks who regulate airlines. The folks who regulate TV and radio. Who cares?. How much time do you spend in the great outdoors? Most of the time. Not as much as I’d like. What’s the outdoors and why is it so “great?”. And if you do happen to get back to nature, what do you do? Go to the beach. Camp, hunt, fish… the usual stuff. Glamp. Tan. Which sort of architecture do you find most pleasing to the eye? Country estates. Modern skyscrapers. Old urban neighborhoods. Old shacks in the middle of nowhere. Shopping malls with big sales. Where do you do most of your clothes shopping? Places like Nordstrom or Macys. Wal-Mart. Target. Tractor Supply. Wherever there’s a sale!. City dwellers and country folk alike enjoy some... "unique" dishes. Which of the following exotic foods would you most like to dig into? Pickled pig's feet. Escargot. Roadkill sandwich. I wouldn't try any of this crap!. What’s the “other white meat?” Pork. Squirrel. Tofu. When someone says, “Let’s go swimming” what do you picture? A shimmering pool and a mojito. A shimmering ocean and a boogie board. A shimmering river and a beer. A shimmering lake and a rope swing. How many guns do you own? None. 1-5. 5-10. None of yer damn business, Fed!. How often do you see your extended family (aunts, cousins, etc.)? Almost never. Occasionally… like holidays. Pretty often. Damn near every day. You’re out at a restaurant, what non-alcoholic drink do you order? Sweet tea. Soda pop. A glass of water is fine. Bottled water is better. A kale and beet smoothie with a shot of acai juice. What's your idea of expanding your cultural horizons? Visiting a museum or gallery. Attending a play or other performance. Eating out at the local Chinese buffet. Which of these do you love most about where you live? The people. The slow pace. The fast pace. I just love the vibe.